Go directly to jail - do not pass go, do not collect $200

It has been three days into jury duty, and it has proven to be the biggest, most inefficient possible waste of time that could ever be devised by human minds. Basically the day consists of sitting in a fairly small, fairly uncomfortable room, with little entertainment provided. Sure, there's some old, custy magazines (okay to be fair, one copy of Fashion was from June 2005) but that's what you read while waiting for your doctor's appointment, not while sitting trapped in a room from 9.30 to 4.00 waiting to be called to (probably) be rejected for actual jury duty.

Fine, we can't expect entertainment from them. After all, the government is poor, right? But how can you justify making a hundred busy working people sit around aimlessly from 9.30 to 1.00 and then dismiss them without even calling a single person up as a potential juror because you just got word that the services of a jury are not required this day. At all. And the reason you couldn't tell whether or not you needed a jury BEFORE 1.00 was? Pardon me, but I was under the impression that these trials were prearranged. Months in advance. I understand the accused has a right to choose between trial by judge or jury, but what, he gets to change his mind at the last minute? How about twenty-four hours notice and then you can pick your juries for the day in the morning, and let everyone else off.

Of course, this is a somewhat unfair portrayal. On a busier day, it appears that a group (about 1/4 the people in the jury panel) is called, twelve jurors are selected in a process that takes an hour and a half, and then everybody returns and we sit around till 3.30. It would appear clear that the group that was just up is not going to be up again that day, as there are four groups to cycle through and it's only three hours till court adjourns for the day. So their sitting around is fairly pointless, then. I demand answers!!! So I go to Google, and find the following:

An accused who has elected to be tried by judge and jury may “re-elect” to be tried by judge alone. Sometimes such re-elections may occur just prior to jury selection. As well, an accused may plead “guilty” or a case may be unavoidably postponed. On such occasions, as a result of some or all of these unpredictable events, no juries need be selected from a given jury panel. When this occurs, it is important to realize that by your attendance and readiness to serve, you have performed an important duty of citizenship, and the justice system, with your assistance, has been maintained.

Okay, unavoidably postponed. Fine. But why are you allowed to re-elect to be tried by judge alone just before jury selection?!? Too bad, you made your danged choice, probably with the help of a highly educated and experienced lawyer. Also, why couldn't you have decided whether or not you were going to plead guilty the night before, thus saving us a day of boringness? I'm all for civic duty, but how can you explain such a blatant waste of time? Oh wait, I'm sorry, apparantly by sitting in a small and uncomfortable room for three days, doing nothing, you too can help maintain our (crappy, crappy) justice system. There were three murder trials on the board without juries! They could have at least started picking the juries for that. C'mon, what are you holding out for, one random sampling of people is as good as the next. I understand that some wait-time is necessary, but honestly this is ridiculous. At least make the room more comfortable! Some more tables would be nice. Play something on the TVs that are ALREADY UP, maybe? One full day without a single juror picked! Gaaaah! I need a flipping get out of jail free card.

I'm just bitter, right now. Off to have some sweet, sweet Danish butter cookies now. Mmmm, butter cookies.